Me: This is the dumbest discussion I’ve ever had and I talk to FAN everyday.
Mike: In DMP 110, I left a sheet on which I wrote stuff with my left hand. I wrote stuff like “Mike is the best!!” and the writing looks like it was written by a grade 2. Whoever sees that sheet is going to be like “I don’t know who Mike is, but he’s retarded.”
Me: I hate the BBC.
Fan: Er…what’s the BBC?
Me: …….British Broadcasting Corporation. How do you know CBC and not know BBC?
Fan: It’s possible.
Me: No…it’s not.
Fan: You just have to believe.
Me: I believe you’re an idiot.
Mike: I rap for listeners, blunt heads, fly ladies and prisoners.
Me: Can you NOT rap for me?
Me: I didn’t do that well on a midterm and now I kinda wanna cry, but I don’t usually cry when it comes to grades so I think my hormones are making me their bitch.
Fan: Oh yeah, I finished my thesis proposal presentation last Friday. It went all right. People found it interesting.
Me: That’s good. God forbid Physics should ever be boring.
Mike: Sorry, just trying to start 311 before hitting the gyme.
Me: Why would you put an extra e on that? It’s MORE work to spell it incorrectly.
Mike: Yeah, soe?
Me: What’s a vato?
Mike: Means “dude” or something along those lines in Spanish. “Look vato, you best step back or I’ma have to start swinging now.”
Mike: An example on how to use it.
Me: Oh great. I’m bound to have plenty of use for that statement.
Me: Why did you desert your emo priest to play a mage?
Fan: Because I want to be like Harry Potter.
Me: Harry Potter’s not a mage, he’s a WIZARD.
Fan: I didn’t say I want to BE Harry Potter, I want to be LIKE Harry Potter.
Me: My mom has seen me studying for exams for the better part of my life. It’s pathetic.
Mike: My mom has never seen me studying for an exam. That worries her.
Me: What does it mean when someone says “logging”? He signed offline so I assume it meant goodbye.
Me: But he didn’t say OFF.
James: Then he must be chopping wood.
Mike: The W’s show up weird.
Me: Do they?
Mike: Not everywhere but do a search for Vhile. it will amuse you.
Me: Just read it with a Transylvanian accent!
Mike: Going to bed now. I’m out til the funky child return.
Me: ….I read that as chunky child….just so you know.
Mike: Actually, right now I would love to just lie down with a b00k.
Me: Did you have to replace the o’s with 0’s? Does that make you cool?
Mike: No, it makes me c00l.
Fan: Did you read Slaughter of the Lambs? Or something about slaughter and lambs, but it’s not about killing lambs.
Me: Silence of the lambs? Good Christ Fan.
Me: Sometimes, I’m such a snarky bitch, it’s astounding.
Nancy: I hear ya…because I am one too.
Me: That could have been taken badly.
Guy1: What’s everyone lining up for?
Guy2: The library book sale.
Guy1: Oh really? What book is it?
Fan: I have to get the uPass at the bookstore.
Me: Wait, you’re not taking classes over the summer, so do you still get a uPass?
Fan: Hm, I registered for one. Will drop it later. I’m taking EOSC 110.
Me: …it’s not valid for an honours biophysicist major!
Fan: Oh I know that. If the prof goes over the class list, he’d be like “uh…this person graduated…with a physics degree…”
Me: Why didn’t you just register for a math class?
Fan: That’d be too obvious.
Me: THAT would be too obvious? But a biophysicist in EOSC isn’t?!
Fan: I want to know about natural disasters.
Me: But you’re not taking the natural disasters course! Natural disasters is EOSC 114.
Cheryl: This is blasphemy AND plagiarism.
Kevin: Martin is peer pressuring me to try new dll’s.
Me: Just say no.
Mike: Raspberry is my favourite berry. What’s yours?
Me: I don’t think I have one. I like mangoes.
Mike: MANGO IS NOT A BERRY. HOW CAN YOU NOT HAVE A FAVOURITE?
Me: BECAUSE I’M NOT A FREAK THAT RANKS BERRIES.
Kevin: Dude, just don’t hijack files.
Me: Dude, you do it all the time.
Kevin: Dude, don’t you start with me.
Beej: I’m gonna draw you and your children.
Me: No…draw Kevin and his KPT-ness.
Kevin: I’m glad you don’t call me KP, otherwise that could have been awkward.
Me (sounding it out): Draw Kevin and his KP-ness.
Cheryl: I’ve been in hiding.
Me: Is it hiding if everyone knows you’re there?